Blog Archives

Barry Watson from 7th Heaven is how old?

Matt Camden

I had to triple take IMDB this morning. Matt Camden from 7th Heaven—or Barry Watson as his parents named him— turned 39 today. Seriously, I used to get the (Teaching Mrs.) tingles watching this guy every Monday night as the bible thumping Matt Camden on 7th Heaven.

See kids, Barry Watson was the original Taylor Kitsch.
Taylor Kitsch

He was the first notable incarnation of John Carter——brooding, dark eyes, shoulder-length Vidal Sassoon-ed hair. Barry was a demi-god back in ’96. I’m not sure why his star did not continue to rise after 7th Heaven left the air, but he was the champion reason why I bought BOP! magazine back in the day. Wherever you are Barry, just know that Taylor Kitsch owes you a round of drinks and pair of sneakers because without your heart-throbbing success, he could’ve never battleshipped his way into America’s heart.

Happy Birthday Barry.

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Shia The Spy

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By now, I’ve come to recognize that due to bratty antics in and around Hollywood, my dearest Shia LaBeouf is an acquired taste—this will not stop me from crushing hard in his direction. What can I say? I like boys with chips on their shoulders. 

In the latest casting news from The Hollywood Reporter, LaBeouf will team up on a project with Robert De Niro and his former Disturbia and Eagle Eye director, DJ Caruso. Titled Spy’s Kid, the film would cast De Niro as a real-life CIA veteran convicted of spying. LaBeouf would play his son, a depressed Army discharge who ends up following in his father’s footsteps, serving as a courier of information between an Oregon federal prison and Russia.

My favorite chip-on-his-shoulder young man will pair up with my favorite grumpy-looking, older man. Swoon!

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Pain and Gain and how I can’t get past Marky Mark’s past.

Michael Bay has done it again.

Michael Bay has done it again.

“Pain and Gain” is the newest addition to Michael Bay’s testosterone-filled, candy coated, vapid filmography. The film stars The Rock and Mark Wahlberg as poor, bodybuilders who decide to kidnap, attack, and rob a slew of people for personal gain. Based on a real story, “Pain and Gain” is experiencing major opposition from everyone involved in the real life chaos that occurred a few years ago.

Upon googling the story, I came upon a troubling news story about Wahlberg’s checkered past that I just can’t get past.

No Pain No Gain

No Pain No Gain

He led a life characterized by incidents of petty crime, drug dealing and racism.

He harassed a group of African American school kids with racist epithets, and when he was 16, again using racist language, he attacked a middle-aged Vietnamese man and left the man blind in one eye. Wahlberg was arrested for attempted murder, plead guilty to assault, and spent 45 days in jail.

And though the right thing to do would be to try to find the man and make amends, Wahlberg says, he admits he hasn’t done so — but says he’s no longer burdened by guilt.

“I did a lot of things that I regretted and I certainly paid for my mistakes,” Wahlberg says. “You have to go and ask for forgiveness and it wasn’t until I really started doing good and doing right, by other people as well as myself, that I really started to feel that guilt go away. So I don’t have a problem going to sleep at night. I feel good when I wake up in the morning.”

Marky Mark was throwing epithets at Black people! But he was a frickin’ white rapper! How does that even work? Yuck. I mean double yuck. I mean, on a scale of 1-10 how many Hail Mary’s do you have to say for blinding a man because of his skin color? 100? 1000? Jesus wept. While we’ve all done things in our youth that were unsavory——the violence and bigotry in his past just leaves me unsettled. Is Wahlberg still straight up loony tunes with a dash or two of that Dog the Bounty Hunter/Jesse James racist streak? The world may never know..

I can remember 1998 like yesterday. I was 15.5 years old and in full, complete, and total love with the musical stylings of Korn and the body and mind of Angel as portrayed by David Boreanaz. (Forgive me) I had this huge subway-sized poster of Angel on my wall, in some burgundy crushed velvet button down and a pair of raggedy black high-waisted leather pants. He was my everything, until one year later when Spike showed up and I followed that bad bleach job into the vamp abyss.

In loving memory of my Angel crush.

Where are you James McAvoy? I miss you.. 

HAVE MERCY.

Can’t stop enjoying this delicious pic of Tom Hardy at a recent Lakers game in Los Angeles.

Best part of “The Cape”.

Jason Segel and Chloe Sevigny

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The gossip machine is alive with talks of a possible new couple alert. One of Danger’s Dreamboats, Mr. Jason Segel, was reportedly spotted making out with Chloe Sevigny star of  “Kids” and “Big Love”. They were going steady at some Emmy party and when people noticed them they took off into the night together. I wonder if he reenacted a Dracula muppet sequence for her when they got home?  Too adorable for words.

Happy birthday to the best Robert on the silver screen.

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Nihilist. Debaucher. Sadist. Psycopant. Boxer. Grandpa.  My dearest Robert DeNiro has played a lot of it all. Today Dangerbowie.com celebrates De Niro’ s 66th birthday. After nearly 6 months spent taking a stroll down DeNiro’s filmography I am left furiously empassioned by his acting and total embodiment of character. No one plays a more charming sociopath. No one is a more believable gangster. It doesn’t hurt that from about 1970-1994, I would have probably sold my right leg for one night with Mean Streets’ Johnny boy.

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So three cheers to a man who alongside  the great Scorcese helped change the face of cinema. Watching Cape Fear for the first time at 12 years old ( a horribly inappropriate age to deal with such subject matter..tsk tsk Mom), a young Danger Bowie was properly introduced to DeNiro as a creep. Sitting in the theater at the $1.75 show and squirming a little as  Max Cady slipped a finger into the mouth of the pubescent Juliette Lewis , I can remember thinking this is the grossest yet most hypnotic and sexy thing I had ever seen. Then I wanted to see more.

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I was on the hunt for every De Niro movie or appearance mein greedy eyes could see.  Goodfellas, Heat, This Boy’s Life, Casino, The Fan, Sleepers, I couldn’t get enough. I wondered how immersed one person could become in constantly pretending so deeply to be someone else. Essentially De Niro gave me my first artistic existential thought. Thank you Robbie.

 Robert Mario De Niro Jr. has given the world countless hours of hardcore entertainment. His realistic portrayal of underdogs and his relentless passion to transcend his characters have made for amazing film spectacles. 

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When he’s not method acting, he stays busy with the  Tribeca Film Festival, his fancy eatery Nobu, and  the Greenwich Hotel. If I am a tenth as lucky as I think I am, perhaps I will one day be able to shake Robert De Niro’s hand, or say hello as he drives by. Any small amount of contact will do, I’m not that picky. Until then I have 3  more De Niro flicks on my coffee table, awaiting my eager viewership. Happy Birthday Bobby. I heart you.

 

 

Eastbound and Down is my gravitas.

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Witness the fall from grace of baseball superstar pitcher, Kenny Powers on “Eastbound and Down”. The 2 disc DVD made it’s way to stores on June 30th and it is all that I could hope for. As one of the biggest champions of Danny McBride, I urge you to get on board because he is so worth it. I foresee a Hollywood future with McBride’s mug all over the place, with his devil may care sexiness, penchant for southern quips and eloquent comedic execution.

Now for a little background on this HBO series. The episodes are continuations of each other so they are best viewed as a long 3 hour movie, and you will not be disappointed. The dark comedy was written by Danny McBride, Ben Best and Jody Hill, the trio from the dirty south that brought us “FootFist Way”,so expect a lot of darkness and a lot of raunchy goodness.

“Kenny Powers”, beautifully played by a mulleted McBride, becomes a 19 year old superstar pitcher in baseball, years pass and time is unkind. His arrogance, ruthless behavior, and  hate filled demeanor are the nail in his coffin when he slowly begins to lose his pitching arm. After jumping from team to team he finds himself out of work, broke, drug addicted, and completely burned out. He is forced to return to his podunk hometown, where he rooms with his brother and his family. He takes a job at a local middle school as a P.E coach and runs into his former flame played by the fierce Katy Mixon. Slight problem, she is now engaged to the principal of the school and Kenny is not taking no for an answer. He trips over himself as he throws all his sexiness into the pursuit of her love.

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Over the course of the 6 “chapters” or episodes, we watch Kenny decimate all the relationships around him while the supporting cast tugs on your heart strings with their sympathetic nature and goodwill. Katy Mixon is all moxy and sass as “April”, Kenny’s former high school sweetheart. Without the supporting cast coming through with just the right amount of self respect sand sympathy,  Kenny would be an asshole surrounded by a bunch of enablers.

I think one of the best parts of the show is how unbelievably quotable each episode can be. Kenny says the absolute wrongest things to everyone he comes in contact with. Without spoilers, I can only mention his “on the reg” speech to the principal but it is improvised to perfection in the hands of McBride. He calls his portly blond nephew, “blond ambition tour” and I cried with laughter. While Eastbound is not riddled with pop culture references the little bits he throws out are fantastic.

eastbound.embedded.prod_affiliate.56Kenny will do the worst things and you will hate yourself for laughing as he blazes hate trails all around his hometown but McBride plays him with such panache and bravado that you slowly start to forgive him and his vast shortcomings. The second best part of  “Eastbound..” are the guest stars. Expect great moments from Craig Robinson and Adam Scott, but it is Will Ferrell as “Ashley Schaffer” owner of Ashley Schaffer BMW who will affect you the most. His awkward white wig and his penchant for close talking will make you chuckle and get you nervous.

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Kenny on his jetski (pictured above) should get it’s own spin off show, it’s so good. Don’t short yourself by skipping over the special features on disc 2. The gag reel and Kenny Powers motivational video are definitely among the highlights. The show has been renewed for another season but McBride has 5 films in development at the moment so there’s no telling when he’ll get the chance to sit down and write a follow up season to this HBO magnum opus. Three cheers for my favoritest guy of all time, Mr. McBride.