Youth In Revolt coming soon to a theater near you

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Youth in Revolt by C.D. Payne has been one of my favorite books since I could still be considered a youth. The book serves as a tome for teens and some grown ups who are fighting against the odds of growing pains , frustrations, and learning to deal with the opposite sex. Plenty of tomfoolery ensues, homelessness, bait and switch, dressing up in drag to escape authorities, step parents, and a camping trip.

The book has now been adapted into a movie starring Superbad’s Michael Cera and Steve Buscemi. I am excited and scared all at once that they could possibly have ruined a book that I cherish so much, I reread it twice every year. Especially after Sunday’s viewing of this “treasure”:

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I’m almost scared to go to any theater for the remainder of the summer after watching “Year One”. No matter what Cera will be given the opportunity to redeem himself as I will watch “Youth In Revolt” when it’s released in the fall. BUT if they crucify one of my favorite books cinematically, Michael Cera will have to answer to me and trust me when I say I don’t take no guff.

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Thanks for everything Labeouf!

Photo: FayesVision/WENN.com
Photo: FayesVision/WENN.com

Dear Shia,
I just came across this picture of you from yesterday night’s Los Angeles premiere of your summer blockbuster Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen and I thought it would be a great time to pen this letter to you. First off, you are adorable and I am a mere 24 hours away from watching you run from computer generated robots and explosions while you romance Megan Fox. Although I could do without the romance part, I must say I am heavily excited to watch your latest work. Thank you for cleaning up so well, marry me..err..date me for like 6 months and then we’ll be close friends. I am a realist. You are the bees knees.

Stay gold,
Danger Bowie

“Hangover” the cure for your summer blues

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By now, almost every American has seen the Hangover at least once, so I’m not going to attempt a hard sell on this one. I had a chance to watch this movie back in February at a private screening where they served booze so i went in pretty stoked and pretty skeptical, I mean getting your target demographic plastered before you show your finished product is implying something . Aside from some minor glitches in editing earlyin the movie the test screening was a success. My guest Monicais and I really enjoyed it and vowed that upon release we would see it’s final cut.

So heading over to the Vista theater in Los Angeles we were superstoked to see it again because we discovered that Bradley Cooper is the ABSolute business. The movie is about 4 guys who happen upon some trouble when they head out to Vegas for their best friend’s bachelor party. Tigers, Tyson, Mike Epps, and a few Roofies later they find themselves suffering from amnesia, missing teeth, and a missing groom.

Watch this movie because it is a great offering from Todd Phillips, the director of Old School, it’s proof that a couple of guys in an extraordinary situation can still hold down an original comedic plot line without major stars. Thanks to the movie gods for their offering of Mr. Bradley Cooper or Coop as I intimately call him. He is a cinematic cupcake and my glucose is scarily low. Here’s a little Coop bustin’ out of his vest for your dining pleasure:

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For your Consideration: “Land of the Lost”

Land of the Lost Movie 2009

I know that by now pretty much everyone in America has written off Land of the Lost as the first real flop of the summer, monetarily you may be correct but in actuality you are wrong.  I’ve seen “Land of the Lost” twice theatrically and I’d call it the funniest movie of the summer thus far.

Albeit if you are not a fan of Will Ferrell this could be a tough pill to swallow, well don’t be a tight ass and  allow the sweet comedic executions of  Danny McBride to change your mind. I’ll stop trying to sell you on it in such a political way and speak on the plot for a second.

Dr. Rick Marshall, Ferrell, has become the ass of the quantum physics world because of his wild alternative universe beliefs. He is tracked down by a young ambitious scientist, Holly, who urges him to finish building a device that would allow him to time travel.

After a food coma they hit the road to find the best place from which to test their device and that’s how they come upon Will Stanton, played by the incomparable Danny McBride, a redneck who runs the road side attraction where the time travel device works best. At a certain point in the cave of the roadside attraction the device comes ot life and the trio are propelled into a parallel universe where they meet Chaka,Lonely Island’s Jorma Taccone, a primate king who becomes a part of their motley crew. Then it is on. Full steam ahead. Some amazing unexpected gags and tear inducing laughter follows. I won’t give anything away because I am on an Obama like crusade to redeem this movie and I need your help. Enough pandering, the moral of the story is that you will miss out if you skip this movie. Do you like to laugh? Well what the hell are you waiting for?

Please don’t watch “Year One” it will be a grave mistake, I was there on Sunday and this movie is the more superior of the 2. Danny McBride and Will Ferrell possess more chemistry in their pinky toes than Michael Cera and Jack Black have in their matted unoriginal wigs.

F^%$ Peter Travers and all the Anti-Ferrell/Sandler critics who need explanations for their comedy. Those guys have been entertaining me since I was a kid. I don’t need the constant reminer of the deteriorating world around me, sometimes I need a nicely executed dick joke or a redneck prat to remind me that life is as simple and  funny as it is ridiculous and petty. Watch this movie for the 5 moments when your eyes well with tears from watching them commit to  some oddball behavior in their ridiculous awespiring adventures. Here’s a pic of my McBride for the road:

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Guy Ritchie is my hero. Sherlock Holmes Teaser Trailer. Enjoy

RDJ on the set of "Sherlock Holmes"
RDJ on the set of "Sherlock Holmes"

This is not a spoof trailer from the beginning of “Tropic Thunder”. Don’t expect Jason Statham or any “Rock’N’Rollas”. This is the first official kickass preview of Guy Ritchie’s epic Christmas day offering to the world, “Sherlock Holmes”. Starring the ubiquitous and magnetic Robert Downey Jr. as the titular character and the charismatic Jude Law as his loyal cohort “Dr. Watson”, the movie embodies the humorous and epic “Pirates of the Caribbean” tone, coupled with a contemporary approach to the film style.

Guy Ritchie is sure to get tongues wagging with his departure from the major elements in the novels written by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Holmes is traditionally portrayed as a well groomed, refined, wiry and astute gentleman who happened to be a great boxer, singlestick expert and fencer. Downey seems to have created a quirky slightly sloppy but wholly endearing version of the literary Holmes. With the fusion of Guy Ritchie’s unique brand of filmmaking and Robert Downey Jr. as the deliciously entertaining literary hero, it’s a safe bet to say that it’s going to be a wonderful Christmas.

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Obsessed, gee, thank you Beyonce

I don't like people playing on my phone.
I don't like people playing on my phone.

Sorry for the brief absence kids, but I’m back with a vengeance. I had the opportunity to check out last weekend’s #1 movie, “Obsessed” starring Beyonce, Idris Elba, and Ali Larter. I’ll start by saying that it’s nice to have a movie with minority leads get the top spot at the box office, especially when the movie is not a stereotypical depiction of hood life. However, next time I’d prefer a flick that was 90% more original and did not feature the entire story in the 2 minute trailer.

Idris Elba, enjoying an amazing year of work, plays Beyonce’s super successful, super suave, super naive husband Derek Charles. He is an asset manager, Jerry O’ Connell is his best friend and everything is right with the world. Until Ali Larter’s character, “Lisa”, starts working at his firm as his temp. She is immediately attracted to Derek, and who wouldn’t be, he’s attractive, successful, a loving family man, and just naive enough to not see that Lisa has become, well, obsessed with him. Beyonce plays Sharon, a no nonsense stay at home wife, who used to be Derek’s assistant at the office. Lisa takes sexual matters into her own hands at the company Christmas party by sneaking into the bathroom while Derek is taking a leak and proceeding to seduce him. After this the shit pretty much hits the fan. Lisa begins to stalk him, gets access to his car and hotel room during a business trip, and proceeds to try to make the man her own.

Idris Elba, Beyonce, Ali Larter
Idris Elba, Beyonce, Ali Larter

The movie is being tauted as Jungle Fever meets Fatal Attraction . I beg to differ, for if this movie was even 50% as good as either of those films then it would have been memorable at best. A generic screenplay fostered a promising cast that had nothing to work with. The audience’s  laughter and comments during the screening made the movie more interesting. For other movies this would have spelled the kiss of death, but in this case public opinion was very welcomed. It’s nice to see a diverse cast but it’s even nicer when you don’t feel like your demographic is being mocked. Screw the Madea effect, where the studios now believe that black people will watch anything starring black people. That’s another hopeless insult to a race of people who have been insulted far too often in Hollywood. If those studio heads really believe this effect is true, then why aim so low? Why not attempt to make a well rounded movie?  I hope the next time a disposable interracial suspense thriller is greenlit, the studios remember that it’s not just casting that’s important, a decent script is a necessary requirement as well.