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It’s Coming..

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Happy Tuesday morning to my vampire lusting America. Just a reminder November 20 2009  is less than 2 months away. That means only 56 days until the phenomenon that is New Moon, takes over the world. Ladies around the globe prepare to have your hearts melted at the hands of the ravenous vampiric love beast that is Edward Cullen. Swoon.

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In defense of Diablo

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I’m very confused by this weekend’s box office results. Diablo Cody, Oscar winning screenwriter, and Megan Fox, every hetero American male’s dreamgirl, released a horror/comedy movie featuring Fox and a lesbian kiss yet it only managed to take 5th place, taking in a little over $6 million in it’s opening weekend. What?!

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So why didn’t the movie perform to expectations? Megan Fox did a complete blitz marketing campaign, from a zillion magazine covers to starting feuds with Michael Bay and mental health. Dangerbowie.com saw a 200% increase in site views because of the last Megan Fox post. Even writer Diablo Cody was out there pimping it strong but to no avail. Perhaps the R rating killed the chances of a large portion of it’s would be audience. There was also talks on the interweb about how the horror comedy genre just doesn’t play well to Americans. What “they” are saying  is that we (Americans) will watch giant robots come to life and breakdance, we can get into teen angst vampires, but the concept of Evil Dead or Gremlins just don’t do it for us commercially? Bollocks.

I firmly stand behind this project because it is so rare that you get a movie written, directed and starring women in non traditional roles.It’s always the same  romantic comedy that paints a one sided picture of the ditz/chubby/awkward/dumb girl who eventually gets the guy. They took Jennifer’s Body and spun in it in an entirely different direction and kudos to them. I hope that this softer opening weekend doesn’t prevent these ladies from continuing to make movies that feature women in different societal roles. Long live Diablo!

Dylan Dog, finally coming to a theater near you.

Dylan Dog for your viewing pleasure

Dylan Dog for your viewing pleasure

“Dylan Dog” , a supernatural detective comic book has had a long 18 months in limbo. Original director of “Final Destination”  David R. Ellis peaced out, then there was the major location change, Louisana in lieu of London. Hastles aside it was announced today that the movie is now slated for release and will begin filming very soon in New Orleans.

Sam and Brandon image: Supermanhomepage.com

Sam and Brandon image: Supermanhomepage.com

TMNT writer, Kevin Monroe is now directing the flick which stars  Brandon Routh (Superman) as “Dylan Dog”, Sam Huntington (Jungle2Jungle) as “Marcus”, Dylan Dog’s loyal sidekick, and rounding out the cast is Taye Diggs (Equilibium) as Dylan’s vampire nemesis. Allow me to add two quick bits; 1) Sam Huntington is Paul Dano but blond, conducting a google image search really brought that to life and 2) “Equilibrium” was the most awesome movie that almost no one has seen. Damn shame, Netflix or Blockbuster it for a good time.

Diggs in "Equilibrium"

Diggs in "Equilibrium"

Now, I know Hollywood always has to kill a good thing. Just because “Dark Knight” was a success, it doesn’t mean that you should option every comic book ever made into a’ movie. Honestly I could’ve just reread my “Watchmen” comic book instead of spending that 3 hours watching a near accident, not quite as exciting as a head on collision but not neccessary to rubber neck. That’s a horrible analogy.

Just because “True Blood” and “Twilight” are making money doesn’t mean that every action movie needs a vampire. I mean “Twilight” wasn’t even a vampire movie, it was a romantic drama, er, a dromance? Sorry.

Brandon Routh, Sam Huntington, and Taye Diggs in a supernatural comic book movie?

I’ll be the first to pry my foot out of mouth if this works. I promise.

Milk it ’til the last drop Hardwicke!

Twilight: the Director's Notebook

Twilight: the Director's Notebook

Catherine Hardwicke, famously stepped down from directing the Twilight saga in the beginning of November much to the devastation of young vamp-agers everywhere. No one knows the real reason behind the split but one can almost assume it was Kristen Stewart’s mouth acting. Just Kidding.

Catherine started off her career as a production designer in notable films such as “The Newton Boys” starring Skeet Ulrich, “Three Kings” and “Tankgirl” starring the honorable Lori Petty of “Pointbreak” fame. She then went on to direct “Thirteen” a disturbing look at surburban teenaged girls and the “Lords of Dogtown” an awesome memoiry look into the world of the guys who innovated skateboarding.

Rob Pattinson looking cold

Rob Pattinson looking cold

Now with the smash box office success of “Twilight” some genie granted Catherine one final teen mania wish and decided to publish the notes she took while directing this “masterpiece”. “Twilight: the Director’s Notebook is being released in bookstores, Hot Topics, and Claires everywhere. Enjoy everything from costume design to locations, but most importantly with 15 million shots of “It” boy Rob Pattinson this “book” is assured to please the Twi Hards and sell at least a few thousand units to other pre-adolescents. The Twilight merchandising train will chug on toward the March 21 DVD release of the movie to end all movies: “Twilight”. Also available in Blu-ray for 8 times the price.

I’ve included a hot shot of Robby Pattinson so more people will read my blog. Cheers.

Aww, he's just like us, he has pit stains..:)

Aww, he's just like us, he has pit stains..:)